Therapy for Emotional Overcontrol & Perfectionism
Therapy for Emotional Overcontrol in NY, NY, & CT
Living with emotional overcontrol can feel like being driven by a constant need for perfection, order, and self-restraint. These traits often come at a high personal cost, in their extreme states they lead to social isolation, chronic anxiety, and a feeling of being "stuck." At Metro NY DBT Center, we understand that overcontrol is a complex challenge, and we provide expert, evidence-based therapy designed to help you cultivate flexibility, genuine connection, and emotional expression.
Our clinicians specialize in
Radically Open DBT (RO-DBT) for disorders of overcontrol. We offer these targeted mental health services across NY, NJ, & CT to help you build a more open and fulfilling life.
Understanding Emotional Overcontrol
Emotional overcontrol is not just being a "perfectionist" or "highly disciplined." It is a pervasive pattern of inhibiting emotional expression, rigid thinking, and social aloofness that can significantly impair your quality of life and relationships. Key features of overcontrol include:
Rigid Cognitive and Behavioral Patterns: A strong need for rules, structure, and predictability; difficulty adapting to change or unexpected situations.
Inhibited Emotional Expression: Difficulty showing or even experiencing emotions, often appearing "flat," distant, or hard to read to others.
High Threat Sensitivity and Low Reward Sensitivity: A tendency to focus on potential mistakes and threats while having difficulty relaxing, being spontaneous, or celebrating successes.
Social Disconnectedness: Despite often having good social skills, individuals may struggle to form close, reciprocal bonds due to emotional distance and perceived aloofness.
This pattern is a core feature in conditions like Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD), chronic depression, treatment-resistant anxiety, and anorexia nervosa.
Our Therapeutic Approach to Overcontrol
Treating emotional overcontrol requires a specialized approach that goes beyond traditional talk therapy. We utilize leading evidence-based therapies designed to increase openness, flexibility, and social connection.
Evidence-Based Therapies
Our program is centered on the leading treatment model for overcontrol:
Why Choose Metro NY DBT for Overcontrol?
Choosing Metro NY DBT Center means working with a team that has specific expertise in the nuances of treating overcontrol.
Expertise in Radically Open DBT (RO-DBT)

We are highly skilled in providing RO-DBT, the gold-standard treatment for overcontrol. We understand this is a specialized approach, different from standard DBT.
A Focus on Connection

We know that the goal of treating overcontrol is not to eliminate self-control, but to enhance your ability to form genuine connections with others and live a more meaningful life.
A Non-Judgmental Environment

Our therapists model the warmth, openness, and playfulness that we help our clients cultivate, creating a safe space to practice new ways of being.
Personalized Care

Your treatment plan will be tailored to your unique challenges, whether you are struggling with OCPD, chronic depression, or other issues related to overcontrol.
Begin Building a More Flexible Life in NYC, NJ, & CT
You do not have to be trapped by rigidity and perfectionism. A more open, connected, and spontaneous life is possible. If you are ready to learn new skills and build healthier patterns, we are here to help. Contact Metro NY DBT Center to learn more about our treatment for emotional overcontrol.
Contact us today to schedule a consultation.
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Frequently Asked Questions About Overcontrol Therapy
Isn't being a perfectionist a good thing?
While having high standards and being conscientious can be strengths, maladaptive perfectionism (a key part of overcontrol) becomes a problem when it leads to chronic anxiety, prevents you from completing tasks, makes you inflexible, and damages your relationships. Therapy helps you keep the positive aspects of your conscientiousness while letting go of the rigid perfectionism that causes distress.
How is RO-DBT different from standard DBT?
They are designed for opposite problems. Standard DBT is for emotional undercontrol (e.g., intense mood swings, impulsivity, as seen in BPD). Radically Open DBT (RO-DBT) is for emotional overcontrol (e.g., emotional inhibition, rigidity, social withdrawal). While both use mindfulness and skills training, the skills and targets are very different. If you're not sure what modality would work best for you and your situation you can read more here or get in touch with any questions.
What kinds of problems does overcontrol cause?
While it can lead to success in some areas, overcontrol often leads to chronic loneliness, difficulties forming intimate relationships, burnout, high anxiety, and persistent depression. It can also make it very difficult to adapt to major life changes.
How do I know if I'm "overcontrolled"?
Ask yourself: Do people describe me as "hard to read," "too serious," or "uptight"? Do I have a very hard time relaxing or being spontaneous? Do I spend a lot of time planning and worrying about getting things perfect? Do I feel lonely, even when I'm around other people? If you answered yes to several of these, it may be worth exploring in an assessment.
Is this treatment just for OCPD?
No. While it is a primary treatment for Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD), RO-DBT is a "transdiagnostic" treatment, meaning it is effective for any condition where overcontrol is a core issue. This includes many forms of chronic depression, treatment-resistant anxiety, and restrictive eating disorders.